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Feb 2014 by PCI College

Let's Add Another 'R' to Romance this Valentine's Day

What do you think of when you think of Valentine’s Day...Romance and Roses? But what about adding the ‘R’ that will make a real difference………looking at the Relationship.

Maybe this is a good time to look at what really matters...the quality of the Relationship and ask why are couples and counsellors alike often reluctant to look at ways in which the Relationship can be improved.

Relationships depend on communication and a better understanding of each other’s concerns. Romance without a trusting and caring environment is going nowhere so let’s stop the pretence and take time out to examine and improve the relationship and make a real difference.

For counsellors it is a good time to look at training in the area of couples and relationships and thinking about ways you can help provide a safe and reassuring atmosphere to help foster real romance.  PCI College
Professional Certificate in Couples Counselling provides training in providing a calm and safe environment that will help promote Romance in the Relationship that will last way beyond Valentine’s Day.  You will acquire the skills to listen, clarify difficulties and help couples to express their thoughts and feelings in a meaningful way.  


Managing expectations....

Absence makes the heart grow fonder but you have to be good at managing absence versus perceived abandonment.

John Lennon says ‘All you need is love’...but only if you are equipped to overcome obstacles.

Love is Blind...don’t try letting it all hang out after first 3 dates!

Actions speak louder than words....If you wash her car for her make sure to tell her.

It’s the thought that counts....wears thin after a while – all talk and no action can lead you no-where.

Love doesn’t cost anything... if there is sentiment and thoughtfulness behind it, it can be captivating but still needs careful planning.


Helpful hints for a Strong Relationship:

  • Good communication
  • Handle differences maturely
  • Neither partner is controlling
  • Give and receive affection regularly
  • Have a good balance of time alone and together in the relationship
  • Family and friends rarely interfere
  • Agreement on finances
  • Flexibility and good conflict resolution skills
  • Share equally responsibilities
  • Able to express feelings and feel heard


Unhelpful practices in a Relationship:

  • One partner is too stubborn
  • Criticism and negativity
  • Feeling responsible for all that goes wrong
  • Avoiding healthy conflict
  • Avoidant communication

Finally remember working on developing and maintaining a good Relationship is about turning stumbling blocks into stepping stones....


Mary O'Loughlin

PCI College Lecturer

Mary holds an Honours Degree in Counselling & Psychotherapy from Middlesex University and has been tutoring in PCI College since 2006.  She holds an Advanced Certificate in CBT, has specialist training in sexuality and family therapy and specialises in couples counselling.  Mary is also a counsellor and supervisor with Accord and the Rape Crisis Centre.

What our Students Say

"My memory of PCI is that it was one of the best experiences I have had in a learning environment. I am working as a marriage counsellor with Accord Kilkenny and I am now putting into practice what I learnt from your College. Thank you very much."
Mary Curtin - BSc (Hons) in Counselling & Psychotherapy Graduate

What our Students Say

"Mix of experiential & practical theory, the pace was good and Mike was very engaging and informative. I found it fascinating and it gave me a good platform for working with dreams personally and in practice."
Karen O'Leary-Using Dreams in Private Practice
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